SCENE 8

Scene opens with a survey of a the anatomy lab, vacant of living people, all tanks closed. Cut to lecture hall, Dr. Botterman is finishing his introduction to anatomy.

Dr. Botterman

So.. today you will just be getting the feel for how things work: getting used to the scalpel and the smell of formaldehyde, but by the end of the week you should have dissected out the entire eyeball.

random med student in audience

Whispering to neighbor

That’s disgusting.

Dr. botterman

All right well I’ll meet you guys in the anatomy lab. Dale Langone, who is in charge of preparing and maintaining the cadavers for your dissection, has a few words to say about appropriate handling of the bodies. So I’ll turn it over to him.

Dale approaches the front of the lecture hall.

Dr. Botterman

I’ll be walking around the lab for most of the afternoon; you guys let me know if you have any questions. Here you go Dale.

Cut to anatomy lab as audio from auditorium continues, nervous students filing in, looking around, looking at the closed tanks. Cut back to auditorium. Dr. Botterman hands the mic to Dale.

Dale

A little spookily

Thank you Dr. Botterman.

Dr. Botterman leaves.

Dale

Addresses the class in a slightly vampire voice

Good Evening.

Less vampire, smiling

I know it’s before noon, but I just like saying that. For the next 3 months you all will be cutting on my cadavers.

Pause. He sits on a table.

I am an only child. I never knew my father. I was supposed to have a sister, Elizabeth, but my mother went into labor while the three of us -that’s me, my mom, and unborn Elizabeth - were vacationing in those caves outside of San Antonio. I was eleven years old, but there was nobody else around so I tried to deliver her myself..in a cave. There was a lot of blood, and a few minutes after Elizabeth came out, mom fell asleep, and never did wake up. Elizabeth couldn’t seem to breathe and she died in my arms, as I rocked her gently.

He’s staring into space recalling this, rocking an imaginary baby

So beautiful she was, even in death.

He snaps out of it

These bodies, whose limbs you will dismember and whose organs you will rip away from their proper place and carve up like an old tomato, these bodies are my family.

Cut to lab (again, we hear sound from the auditorium ie Dale’s speech). Students are taking their places around tanks in groups of four, nervously looking at each other and the tank. Becker is shown standing above his closed tank, a determined look on his face, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. This flash to the lab happens quickly, so as not to pull attention away from Dale’s speech. Cut back to auditorium.

dale

I expect you to treat these bodies like you would treat my family. You will not know the name your cadaver carried in life but I fully expect you and your tankmates to come up with a suitable postmortem appellation. At first your cadaver will seem a stranger to you, but I can assure you that over the next three months you will become more intimate with him or her than anyone you have known in life. As you uncover your cadaver’s anatomic secrets

Dale closes his eyes, heading into never-never land

his personality will bloom as a flower emerges after a cold winter. As you cut through your cadaver’s skin

Dale wields an imaginary scalpel, and his breathing becomes progressively heavy

and into the body cavities that breathed air and pumped blood you will feel his life force unmitigated by death, you will confront and embrace your own mortality, you will realize the long-suppressed cannibal inside you and you will know finally that the line between life and death is imaginary.

Dale falls silent, his eyes remained closed. He is breathing slow, deep breaths, his hands and lips quivering slightly. The audience stares blankly at Dale. Dale lets out a deep sigh, drained from his speech, and opens his eyes.

dale

It’s time, ladies and gentlemen, to meet your cadavers.

The class rises from their seats. Cut to lab, most of the students are at their places around their respective tanks, anxiously waiting. Cut to Richard and another random stud waiting at their tank. Shoopa walks up and stands next to Richard.

Richard

excited

Are you at tank #23?

Shoopa

I sure am.

Richard

Me too!

Becker (os)

I’ll be right here to catch you when you faint, Shoopa.

Cut to view that includes Shoopa and Becker. Shoopa wheels around to see Becker right behind her, he’s at the adjacent tank. Becker winks at her.

Shoopa

I don’t mind cold, lifeless bodies – don’t forget I dated you for two years.

Shoopa turns back around. Richard and Shoopa are facing the tank but are glancing at each other. From offscreen, Becker hisses and meows. Shoopa rolls her eyes without turning back around. Richard smiles.

dr. botterman

Okay guys, open your tanks.

Cut to group number one, opening their tank. Everyone looks queasy, one girl covers her mouth and nose with her hand. Cut to group number two, one guy says “cool” while another one says, “man, he smells terrible.” Cut to group number three, with a flamboyantly gay man becoming hysterical on seeing the cadaver. Cut to black, we are inside Richard and Shoopa’s tank, cadaver perspective. We see the tank opening and as the four sets of eyes peering in come into view, they are illuminated by a light emanating from the tank. The lights in the lab are off. The tank is opened, Richard, Shoopa, and two other studs are looking at the camera (from the cadaver’s POV) in silence, wide-eyed.

Richard, Shoopa, and two other studs

amazed

Wow.

They stare in silence a few moments longer.

Richard

She’s definitely dead.

Shoopa

I’ve never seen a dead person before.

They stare in silence a few moments longer.

Shoopa

How can we just start cutting on her? I mean we don’t know what happens when you die, because know one ever lives to tell about it. What if she’s still in there?

One of the other studs looks at Shoopa, confused.

Richard

What if we throw up on our cadaver?

Cut to Becker’s tank. We now see Carolyn is in Becker’s group. Becker addresses his tank.

Becker

You guys mind if I make the first cut?

Carolyn

Shouldn’t we think of a name for him first?

Becker

Let’s cut now and think later.

Cut to Richard’s tank. Richard is holding a dissector with one hand and some scissors with the other.

Richard

Says here the first thing to do on the eyeball approach is to peel away all the skin on your cadaver’s face.

Richard looks up at Shoopa. She shakes her head, as if to say “I’m not going to do that.”

Cut back to Becker and Carolyn’s tank. Becker hands Carolyn a pair of gloves.

Becker

Okay, now you have to hold the glove open like this

He shows her

so I can get my hand in without touching the outside of the glove.

Carolyn

Why?

Becker

It’s the right way.

Carolyn is confused but is too nonconfrontational to argue, she holds open each glove as Becker puts his hand through each of them in an exaggerated way, then holds his hands up in front of him as to maintain a sterile environment.

Becker

Carolyn, scalpel please.

Carolyn glares at Becker. Cut to Richard’s tank. Richard takes a deep breath and since he has no hands free starts raising the cadaver by pressing down on the lever with his foot.

Richard

Reading

Start your incision on the superior aspect of the forehead at the midline and incise to the bridge of the nose.

Shoopa

You want some help with that?

Richard

I got it. Once you’ve exposed the frontal bone of the skull-

Richard’s foot slips, the cadaver falls, Shoopa takes a huge step backward but Richard is pinned and gets a bath of formaldehyde. Everyone is looking at him. Dr. Botterman scratches his forehead.

Shoopa

You’re going to need at least a case of beer to get that smell off your clothes.