SCENE 29

Scene 29 opens with Richard pushing the chart cart, filled with 20 charts, down the hall. He pulls up to a room, whips out the vital signs clipboard, and starts scribbling down some numbers as he screams at his patient from the doorway.

Richard

Ms. Randolph! Any problems overnight?

ms. randolph (OS)

Nah.

Richard

Pooping and peeing?

ms. randolph (OS)

Yep.

Richard

Good. Are you hungry today?

ms. randolph (OS)

Yep.

Richard

Great. Hey check out that big ol wound on your belly for me. What's it look like?

ms. randolph (OS)

Looks okay to me.

Richard

Excellent.

Richard turns his attention to the patient in the near bed.

Richard

Hey Ms. Fester, how are you?

ms. fester (OS)

Well actually I've been vomiting and-

Richard

Great. Hey listen, I need you to pull off all those old bandages on your neck, clean out that big hole we made with this-

Richard tosses some betadine at her.

Richard

And wrap it up with some fresh bandages. Okay?

Richard tosses some bandages at her.

Richard

Thanks.

He scribbles something in a chart as pushes on to the next room, then shoves it back into the cart, arrives at the next room, and grabs the vitals clipboard.

Richard

Mr. Nelley! How are you.

Cut to view of rounding room door, which Richard pushes open to reveal Dr. Jackson, the senior resident, sitting down with two junior surgery residents.

Dr. Jackson

All right! Our star student is here.

Richard smiles a big, facetious smile. The team stands up, preparing to round. They talk as they walk out the door and into the hall.

Dr. Jackson

And how are our patients doing, Richard? You keeping them alive?

Richard

Everyone is fine. Ms. Laughing Horse was very upset and demanded to have surgery today.

Dr. Jackson

to resident one

Ms. Laughing Horse? Let me guess: gallstones.

surg res 1

She's our four o'clock gall bladder.

Dr. Jackson

to Richard

Richard, tell me about the epidemiology of gallstones.

Richard clears his throat.

Richard

Well, um gallstones are very common, especially in older women, especially if they're overweight.

Dr. Jackson

That's an excellent answer, Richard.

Pause. Richard shows the slightest bit of hope on his face.

Dr. Jackson

If you're a nurse. But you're wanting to be a doctor, god help us. Shelly?

surg res 2

25% of women older than 50 have gall bladder disease. Incidence increases with obesity, family history, native american decent, multiparity, rapid weight loss and prolonged parenteral nutrition.

Dr. Jackson

Excellent. Well she'll get her surgery today.

Richard

She asked to speak with the senior doctor on the team, and I told her you would be in to see her later.

Dr. Jackson stops walking, and the team stops with him. He's disgusted.

Dr. Jackson

Did you mention my name?

Richard

Yes.

Dr. Jackson

to surgery resident one

Mike, does he have to see patients?

surg res 1

I'm afraid so.

Dr. Jackson

We can't just pass him, and send him home for the last few weeks of the rotation?

Mike shakes his head.

Surg res 1

Sorry.

Dr. Jackson

Listen Richard. I understand that you don't want to be a surgeon, and patients all over the world are thankful for that, but you still have to recognize the surgical hierarchy. You are on the bottom. Above you are the surgical clerks, technicians, and custodial staff. Then nurses,

He points to his two junior residents.

Dr. Jackson

junior residents, and me. I report to the attending. When something comes up that you can't handle, I want you to refer it to one of the janitors. If he needs to pass it on, he'll tell a nurse, who can consult Shelly, and so on. Do you understand?

Richard

I think so, but where do patients fit into this hierarchy?

Dr. Jackson ignores the question.

Dr. Jackson

Okay, we have to be in the OR at two. Mike you're cutting today?

Mike nods.

Dr. Jackson

Richard go study something, and I'll have anesthesia page you when the patient's ready to move.

The three physicians start to walk away from Richard.

Richard

Dr. Jackson?

Dr. Jackson

What.

Richard

My pager is, uh, broken.

Dr. Jackson

Broken.

Richard

It got wet.

Dr. Jackson

angry

Okay, well, Shelly, this makes me think you need the rest of the day off. Give your pager to Richard. Now take this one off before you shower, okay, buddy?

Dr. Jackson tosses the pager at Richard's chest.

Dr. Jackson

And you can pick up Shelly's patients until tomorrow, lunch.

Richard

But I already have seventeen p-

Dr. Jackson

angry

So you're picking up a few more. We'll see you in preop.

Dr. Jackson and two junior residents walk away; cut to Richard standing there, alone, as we hear Dr. Jackson's parting shot.

Dr. Jackson (OS)

to his two juniors

Can you believe who they let into med school these days?

Cut to black.